In its next column for TheLatch—, BARE Therapy dives deep into the topic of the five best sex positions for maximum pleasure, with full breakdowns on how to get into each.
Last year bought us a whole range of odd trends, from the Milk Crate Challenge to Zuck’s Metaverse welcome video. But perhaps the weirdest one of all? The ‘Spider’ sex position, is apparently one of Australia’s most popular ways to get down and dirty, according to Google. Good for us, it also positions bodies perfectly for pleasure.
So, if a position named after the very thing that can kill us in our backyards hits at the top spot (pun intended), how else can we seek pleasure between the sheets? Here are the five of the best sex positions for orgasming and general fun. You’re welcome.
Some may say the bug is as scary as the position is to execute, as it takes a lot of coordination with your partner to get into position. But once you’re there? The pleasure promised is supreme.
Essentially, the Spider gets its name from what you and your partner would look like looking down from above. The penis-haver sits on the (wide) bed with their legs spread and arms back — kind of letting it all hang out.
Then, the vagina-haver slides forward and onto their hard penis, their legs over the penis-havers and arms also backwards, holding the torsos upwards while pushing genitals against one another. And now, thrust!
This position enables gyrating against the clitoris, deep penetration for both parties, and a full-frontal view of the naked body for the bendy. However, it does take a lot of arm effort to push your gyrating hips into one another, and so we recommend the Spider for the end of your session when you want to climax in pleasure, or on leg day, when your arms may be feeling a little more up to the task.
If you’re more into lazy slow sex than the spindly type described above, the Spoons may be for you.
This position sees you lay in bed with your partner, the penis-haver, behind you, penetrating you from behind. Coming from behind allows for deep penetration while laying down enables your body to completely relax into the feeling and for full-body contact with your lover.
This position can be trickier for some, so take your time finding a position that works and use pillows to prop up your head or hips as needed. And lean into one another’s bodies as much as possible — pull your partner around to kiss your neck, grab their ass as they thrust, and put their hand on your clitoris for additional stimulation while you writhe together. Happy spooning.
Think missionary, but with your legs raised on their shoulders.
The vagina-haver lies down on their back, and the person on top inserts their penis or strap-on into them after lifting their legs up and onto their shoulders. This should raise the bottom person’s hips up while also flexing their vaginal walls, enabling a tighter cavity for the person penetrating to enter and deeper sensation for both.
This position requires you to look deep into your lover’s eyes, too, and a small kiss on the shin or slap of the ass while thrusting can really connect the pleasure between you.
If you find this position tricky, stick a small pillow under your hips to enable the raised positioning without pushing back on the top partner too much.
Oh, the old favourite. This is a great one for penis and vagina-havers alike because it enables deep penetration, can be modified for extra pleasure, and is perfect for both voyeurs and the shy.
One vagina-haver should get on their hands and knees on the bed, knees shoulder-width apart. The penis-haver (with great foreplay or lubricant) slides in from the back and, due to the positioning, hits the front wall of the vaginal wall — right near the G-spot. If the person on all fours arches their back, such as by going down to their elbows, they should feel extra pressure in this area.
For the person entering from behind, the view of your partner’s buttocks is fantastic, and if you want to get extra kinky, a slight consensual tug of the hair can send electricity flying.
Extra points when you add clitoral stimulation via a vibrator, so the person below is being hit on the G-spot and the clitoris at the same time.
This one is so simple, it’s a surprise more people don’t do it.
A vagina-haver slides down onto their partner, facing away from them like you would in Reverse Cowgirl. Except in this scenario, the penis-haver or partner is lying on their back with one leg bent at an angle — a casual ‘knees up’.
By sliding onto them at this position, you not only get penetration from a penis or a strap-on, you also get clitoral stimulation from thrusting — or humping — against the leg that is bent upward.
Rear entry allows for deeper penetration into the vagina, so hold on to that knee and really get leverage for deeper thrusts and more pleasure.
This position is also great for two vagina-havers, who can essentially scissor in this position, enjoying the friction of one another’s vulva and pubic bones on the thigh, and vice-versa.
Bonus: Whatever You’re Into!
While the above are all physiologically best-placed to give pleasure for a variety of couples, the best way you’ll actually receive pleasure during sex is by doing what it is you (and your partner) are into.
You may get more pleasure from slow and sensual with minimal penetration than your loud neighbours who love whips and chains and all things that excite. When you’re able to fully let go and give in to the moment with yourself or your partner, that’s when true pleasure will come… and so will you.
BARE Therapy specialises in helping clients with all relationships — self, intimate, work, family. Follow for tips and advice: @bare__therapy.