I’ve never kept it a secret that I thought Carrie should have ended up with Aidan on Sex and the City. He was emotionally available, kind, had a dog (so you knew he could care for things other than himself) and was handy around the house. Not to mention, that boy was fiiiiine!
However, as we all know, she ditched him like a half-off item in a clearance bin at Century 21 and ended up with Mr Big, despite the fact he was an emotional terrorist who cheated on his first two wives. Sigh.
Then, of course, we endured the first Sex and the City film in which this man with a piece of coal where his heart should be, DIDN’T SHOW UP FOR HIS WEDDING DAY — leaving his bride to be with a bird stuck to her head and a bottle of vodka to drown her sorrows.
I’ve always found the Carrie/Big “love story” problematic. To me, it perpetuates the idea that women should be accepting of not being treated correctly by their romantic partners and that if they are just patient enough, these unavailable men who leave them feeling inadequate will come around eventually and buy them a penthouse on Fifth Avenue.
Having lived and dated in New York for more than a decade myself, I am here to tell you that if you allow men to treat you terribly and continue to make excuses for why they do, the only person getting a penthouse on Fifth Avenue will be your extremely well-paid therapist.
Yes, the show also tried to counter this idea that terrible men will eventually become better if you just put up with enough of their crap, with the whole “He’s Just Not That Into You” episode, but Miranda was really the only one who seemed to take that advice seriously.
So imagine my irritation when I read that in the upcoming Sex and the City reboot (which I was against from the start) it would seem that after all of that, Carrie and Big are supposedly going through a divorce. Honestly, this ranks up there with the entire ninth season of How I Met Your Mother revolving around Barney and Robin’s wedding only to have them break up in the final episode.
In a leaked script page, Carrie is sitting with her friends Stanford Blatch (Willie Garson), Miranda Hobbes (Cynthia Nixon) and Charlotte York Goldenblatt (Kristin Davis) when she says, “I was taping the podcast, I was washing my hair. Yes, I wasn’t eating or sleeping, but at least I felt good about my marriage. Now I’m just one of the wives he was taking care of?”
The scene would imply that the ill-fated pair are in the process of figuring out an alimony agreement and, presumably, who gets to keep their lavish apartment.
Of course, the leaked script could be a ploy to deter people from the actual plot of the reboot — I’m sure you’ll recall that in the lead up to the first film, pictures of Samantha in a wedding dress circled the internet in an attempt to generate buzz and keep the real storyline under wraps.
There is also the possibility that this leaked scene is part of one possible script that may not actually end up being shot, like the rumoured script for the third film which allegedly saw Big killed off by way of a heart attack.
However, if Carrie and Big have in fact gone their separate ways — like so many couples sadly do — then we will have taken on all of that emotional labour for what? The ultimate cautionary tale that if it takes 76 attempts at a relationship and one cancelled wedding you are probably not with the right person? Or that it’s fine to go through all of that as long as you get a good deal in the divorce settlement?
We also know that Aidan will be making an appearance in a few of the episodes of the reboot, but I sincerely hope it is not so that he and Carrie can get back together yet again.
He and Pete (or whichever dog he has now as Pete is probably long dead) deserve better.