The Headlines: NASA’s Moonlanders Are Getting Spacesuit Glow Ups

NASA Upgrades Its Spacesuits

It’s been over 50 years since humans have vibed on the moon. But that’s all about to change because NASA is spending a few folks there in 2025, as a part of the Artemis III mission. What’s more, NASA has hired Axiom Space, a commercial space company, to make them some snazzy moon spacesuits. 

“NASA’s partnership with Axiom is critical to landing astronauts on the Moon and continuing American leadership in space,” said NASA Administrator, Bill Nelson.

“Building on NASA’s years of research and expertise, Axiom’s next-generation spacesuits will not only enable the first woman to walk on the Moon, but they will also open opportunities for more people to explore and conduct science on the Moon than ever before.”

However, something that Nelson didn’t mention is how these spacesuits slay. It’s giving brooding. It’s giving anime energy. It’s giving tiger pop orange.

Oh, and these NASA spacesuits will also make conducting research on the moon a lot safer. The spacesuits are more flexible than the old-school designs, allowing their wearers to easily map the moon’s geology and pick up samples off the ground.

The Oscars’ Free Gift Bags Aren’t Free

Each year, the Oscars offer each of its guests a faux-luxury gift basket. Why faux-luxury? Because offering your guests botox or a piece of Australian land is just gratuitous headline bait. Just give your guest some Freddos and a Hot Wheels, for blimey’s sake.

What’s more, these gift baskets aren’t actually free gifts. They are actually counted as taxable income. 

So, how much are these Oscar gift basket taxes? Well, according to Forbes’ calculations, they’re not cheap as chips.

“They are taxable income,” wrote Robert Wood, a tax expert. “And the gifts are expensive, about $126,000 worth this year. At the 37% IRS tax rate, that’s $46,620. California-based stars will have to pay California’s up to 13.3% tax too, another $16,000 or so. That’s up to $63,378 in state and federal taxes.”

Not to state the undeniable, but $63,378 is a whack of money. You could get around 63,378 Freddos with that cash.

Related: Diversity Wins at the Oscars 2023

Related: This First Nations Group Wasn’t Stoked With the Oscar Gift Bags

Betoota Advocate Goes to Paramount+

The Betoota Advocate: A publication to write such classics as “2017 Crypto Guy Now a 2023 AI Guy.” This satirical joint has won the hearts of many Aussies with such headlines and now has over a million Instagram followers.

Additionally, the Betoota Advocate is now getting its own streaming programme. Thanks to Paramount+, these writers now get to create a series that’ll tackle Australia’s most polarising historical news stories.

In a statement, The Betoota Advocate said that Paramount+ had agreed to let them create a programme that they “wanted to make, and one that everyone else was too afraid to go near.”

“They have also been kind enough to line our pockets with the big TV bucks in the midst of a cost-of-living crisis.”

The Betoota Advocate added, “With the universe aligning, we present the modern history of Australia that nobody really talks about… for a reason. This series tackles four pillars of Australian history. Corruption, money, religion, and tribalism.”

The Latch will let ya know when this new stream drops.

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