While there’s much talk about ‘red flags’ in dating, we tend to pay a lot less attention to ‘green flags’. Which, when you think about it, is silly, really.
If you’re dating to be in a relationship, you want to be able to identify who would make a good potential partner. You want to know: what are some signs of that?
“With 39% of users on dating app Hinge saying they have become more picky since the pandemic, and 91% of these saying it’s because they don’t want to waste their time on the wrong person, it’s important you are looking out for the positive signs that suggest your new romantic match might have long-term potential,” says Logan Ury, director of relationship science at Hinge.
“You can spot them as soon as you match with someone on an app. Are they responsive and consistent with their message? Do they put effort into asking you questions?”
Ahead, Ury shares six behaviours you can look out for in a potential partner, all signs the person is likely to approach relationships in healthy, mature ways.
They Give You Clear and Consistent Communication
“Communication is key in building a strong relationship,” says Ury. “You need to be with someone who can identify their needs and express them. You also want to be with someone who listens to you and takes your needs into consideration.”
Even a pair who seems perfect on paper is going to find themselves in trouble if they aren’t able to communicate clearly, Ury explains.
They Appear to Know Themselves
You don’t want to get lost in your relationship, Ury advises. Instead, a partnership should consist of two people who know themselves.
“Someone who has a strong sense of self will communicate their values and intentions from the start,” she says. “They’re open about their strengths, and their areas of growth. They’re not waiting around for you to tell them who they are or what they should be.”
A whopping 97% of Hinge singles say they’d prefer to date someone who actively takes care of their mental health.
They Make Their Intentions Clear
Situationships can easily be avoided by looking for someone who is upfront from the beginning about what they want, says Ury. “This will help you save heartache and disappointment down the road — not to mention time.”
They Show Effort
Another sign of a solid partner? Someone who’s willing to put in the work.
“Relationships are hard,” says Ury. “Looking for someone who puts in effort — for example, by planning a thoughtful date — is a great sign.”
They Actually Listen
“Does your date remember the details of stories you’ve told them in the past?” asked Ury. “Do they listen when you talk about your friends and coworkers? This also comes up with gifts. If your date remembers that you love plants, and buys you a succulent as a gift, that’s a positive sign.”
They Provide Emotional Support
Finally, Ury says you should look for someone who supports you emotionally or practically, and is there for you like a close friend would be.
“For example, if you’ve had a tough relationship in the past and they allow you to discuss this, it will enable your relationship to evolve in a positive way,” she explains.